CONTAINS SPOILERS
Tonight’s AEW COLLISION was broadcast on TNT and streamed on MAX live from the Fort Bend County Epicenter in Houston, TX!
Tony Schiavone and Nigel McGuinness were the broadcast team for tonight’s event.
It’s Saturday night and you know what that means! This is for the Sickos!
AEW World Champion Jon Moxley and Marina Shafir stormed through the crowd and made their way to the ring!
Moxley: “The show starts when I say it starts! I’m getting a little sick of the Rated R Superstar! Adam Copeland wants a shot at me. You think you can throw your weight around, Cope? I got a list of about a thousand reasons why I’m not going to give Cope an AEW World title shot.
“I don’t like you. I don’t like anything about you. And you don’t know a single thing about me or this place. So you can take your challenge and stick it up your ass. But if it’s a fight you want, we can do it anywhere, anytime. We can even do it next week on Collision. You bring your stupid friend Jay White, and I’ll whoop both your asses!”
3-Way Trios Match!
Undisputed Kingdom—Adam Cole, Roderick Strong, & Kyle O’Reilly
vs.
TNT Champion Daniel Garcia, “Daddy Magic” Matt Menard, & “Cool Hand” Angelo Parker
vs.
Shane Taylor Promotions’ Shane Taylor & The Infantry—Carlie Bravo & Shawn Dean!
Strong chopped at Taylor but Taylor jabbed him back. Roddy lured Taylor in with a kick and then Roddy and Kyle double teamed Taylor. Taylor bulldozed his way through Roddy and Kyle. Daddy Magic grabbed a blind tag and he back elbowed Shawn Dean. Angelo Parker came in, but Adam Cole tagged himself into the match. Cole pushed the Infantry into one another. Garcia came in and pounded the Infantry with punches.
Garcia tried to suplex Taylor, but Taylor countered with a headbutt and followed up with a leg drop to the TNT Champion. Garcia found the strength to suplex Taylor. Garcia tried to tag to his corner, but the Infantry pulled Menard and Parker off the apron. Garcia made a tag out to the Undisputed Kingdom. Cole pump kicked Bravo and then blasted him with a neck breaker across the knee.
The fans chanted “This is awesome! This is awesome!”
All three teams paired off and began to brawl. Garcia hit Kyle with a side suplex. Taylor planted Parker with a package pile driver. The Undisputed Kingdom triple teamed Taylor! Cole lowered the boom and struck Bravo with a running knee strike, scoring the pin! Cole stared into the eyes of TNT Champion Daniel Garcia after the match. AEW World Trios Champions The Death Riders ran down to ringside. Wheeler Yuta blindsided Cole, knocking him into Garcia.
Claudio: “I came out to personally congratulate you on your victory but more importantly to remind everyone who the real best Trios champions are.”
As PAC and Yuta held Cole back, Cole yelled, “You picked a fight with the wrong trio!”
Strong and O’Reilly came in to free Cole from the Death Riders and the Death Riders retreated!
Cole: “I am sick and tired of the three of you thinking you can do whatever you want. Next week, we should cash in on our promise to prove we’re going to be the best trios team. So next week on Dynamite, for the AEW World Trios Championships, it’ll be the Undisputed Kingdom against the Death Riders!”
A highlight package aired for FTR!
Dax Harwood: “We need to hold the AEW World Tag Team titles for a third time. Whoever holds the belts, this is a message for you. We’re back! Top guys, out!”
Alicia Atout was backstage to interview “Platinum” Max Caster!
Caster: “Hangman got angry at me for interrupting on Dynamite. He’s not a man. He’s more like a Hangperson. And you need to get in line because I’ve got an Open Challenge. The Open Challenge is coming back this Wednesday and I’ll continue to prove I’m the best wrestler alive.”
“Bad Apple” Bryan Keith vs. “Most Wanted” Bandido!
Keith threw his poncho at Bandido and then kicked him. Bandido answered with a dropkick. Bandido spun off the top rope with a tornillo. Bandido gorilla press slammed Keith with one arm!
Bryan Keith stunned Bandido with a rising headbutt strike. Keith flung Bandido with a belly to belly off the top rope. Keith and Bandido charged at one another and knocked each other down with running boots in an old school duel. Bandido blasted the Bad Apple with the 21 Plex and pinned Keith!
“What a return for Bandido!” said Nigel.
Lexy Nair was backstage with Powerhouse Hobbs!
Hobbs: “Big Bill, your boy didn’t collect the bounty tonight. But I’ll be in Texas all week long. Let’s see if you want a fight or let’s see if the you’re a big, bad baby.”
Trios Match!LFI’s Dralistico, The Beast Mortos, and Rush
vs.
Ares Alexander, Jay Alexander, & Brick Savage!
LFI dismantled the opposition with ease, picking apart Ares Alexander. Rush delivered the Bull’s Horns and pinned Ares! After the match, LFI continued to make a statement, clobbering Jay and Brick!
Komander sprinted down and smashed Beast Mortos with a poison rana! Komander knocked Rush out of the ring and then kicked Dralistico. Dralistico, Rush, and the Beast Mortos triple teamed Komander, trying to rip off his mask. Suddenly the arena went dark! Hologram returned, coming to the aid of Komander! Hologram and Komander took flight and took care of business, flipping over the top rope in stereo and crashing onto Dralistico and the Beast Mortos! Rush grabbed a steel chair. The referees tried to hold an angry Rush back, but Rush punched one of the officials!
Lexy Nair was backstage trying to get a word with Megan Bayne!
Thunder Rosa stopped Megan and tried to welcome her to AEW. Bayne ignored Thunder Rosa and kept walking, not wanting any of Thunder Rosa’s southern hospitality.
Next: It was time for the Halftime Harley in Houston Concert!
Harley: “I did not come alone. Please say hello to puppet Mercedes. We’re going to kick off tonight with a song you may know called the ‘Moné Train.”’
TBS Champion “The CEO” Mercedes Moné walked out to interrupt the concert!
Mercedes: “Are you stupid or dumb? Everyone bought a ticket to see me! Houston, please say hello to your CEO! And Harley, I don’t know how many times I have to tell you that you’re nothing but a los—”
Harley: “Legend! I want to begin my second song tonight and—"
Mercedes: “Shut up. I get it. You’re talented. But let’s get real. If there’s anything real about you. I don’t get why you want to challenge me to a match when that little puppet can probably wrestle better than you. So get out of my ring because you are not on my level, loser!”
Harley: “You know what Mercedes? You’re right. I’m new to this. I could only ever dream to achieve in my career what you already have. But I have fought so hard to be here and I’m not stopping! I would love nothing more than to face you in Australia for the TBS Title. You’re a game changer. But I have to admit that in your whole career that the most entertaining that you’ve been is when I’ve had my hand up your puppet ass!”
Mercedes heard enough and slapped Harley!
Harley: “Feel the wrath!”
Harley bashed Mercedes in the jaw with the microphone!
Mercedes: “Harley if you want a shot for the TBS Championship at Grand Slam Australia, then you’re on! I can’t wait to embarrass you in front of your friends and family and show them why I’m the CEO!”
“Harley has got her match! The champion agreed to it!” said Tony Schiavone.
Seven days from their Continental Championship match at Grand Slam Australia, Buddy Matthews and Continental Champ Kazuchika Okada went face-to-face!
Okada showed up late to the interview.
Buddy: “Let’s cut to the chase. Australia’s best against Japan’s best in Australia at Grand Slam. The people stand by me. So it’s time for me to beat you for that title. Look me in the eyes and tell me if you think I believe this or if this is some fake façade that I’m playing right now.”
Okada laughed and called Buddy a bitch.
Buddy: “I’ll see you in Australia.”
ROH World Tag & Six-Man Champion “The Natural” Dustin Rhodes
vs.
Izzy James!
Dustin drilled James with the Cross Rhodes and made short work of his match, scoring his 54th AEW win.
“He is ready for Austin and MJF this week on Dynamite,” said Schiavone.
Rhodes: “MJF, you call yourself the devil. You’re not the devil. As I told you last week, I went to hell. I look at the devil in his eyes and I kicked his teeth in. And I ripped, teared and clawed my way out. Because I am a survivor. I am the last of my kind. And Max, while you’re sitting at home in your recliner, I want you to remember one thing: everything in your brain right now, things you plan on doing to me, have already been done.
“Five decades—blood, sweat, tears, and passion, something you do not have. And guess what Max? I’m still here. Next week in my backyard, I am going to drag you to hell and you’re going to meet the actual devil, and I’ll give you a Texas-sized ass whopping for the ages. When you get out of this business are they going to remember you? They’re damn sure going to remember me, bitch!”
AEW World Trios Champions The Death Riders were backstage with a message for the Undisputed Kingdom!
PAC: “Undisputed Kingdom, we welcome your challenge. But we are the elite of the elite. And this week on Dynamite we look forward to making an example out of you.”
Penelope Ford vs. Thunder Rosa (with Toro the Mascot)!
Thunder Rosa exhibited a lot of quickness with arm drags and then a sliding lariat to Ford. Penelope Ford fired back with a double knee drop to Thunder Rosa’s midsection. Penelope Ford followed up with a gut buster.
Penelope got knocked down with two consecutive clotheslines. Thunder Rosa connected with a running dropkick. Thunder Rosa rocked Ford with a Northern Lights Suplex. Ford scored with a running pump kick. Ford tried for a moonsault, but Thunder Rosa rolled out of the way!
Thunder Rosa blasted Penelope with a shotgun dropkick. Penelope stunned Rosa with a cutter for a near fall. Thunder Rosa connected with a back stabber. Thunder Rosa nailed Penelope with a Tijuana Bomb and pinned Penelope!
After the match, Megan Bayne calmly walked to the ring. Bayne got into Thunder Rosa’s face. Penelope Ford ambushed Thunder Rosa, hitting her from behind. Bayne hoisted up Thunder Rosa and then face planted Thunder Rosa!
Lexy Nair was backstage with the Bub B, owner of Trill Burgers, when Ricochet interrupted.
Ricochet: “AEW is no longer Swerve’s house. And Mr. B., these burgers belong to me now.”
Ricochet took a bite of one of the burgers in catering and spit it out. One of the Trill Burgers employees told Ricochet that everyone loved the burgers. Ricochet grabbed the employee by the shirt and threatened him, before laughing and walking off.
Glamourous Exhibition Match!
AEW Women’s World Champion “The Glamour” Mariah May
vs.
Shay KarMichael!
Mariah quickly hit the May Day and picked up a decisive victory!
After the match, Mariah opened up her bag. Mariah dressed up her opponent like Toni Storm, smearing lipstick across her face.
Luther the Butler returned! He was carrying a tray with a bloody shoe on it. Mariah spat at Luther! Mariah went back to her opponent, but it was “Timeless” Toni Storm, who had traded places with Shay! Toni headbutted Mariah! Before Toni could inflict anymore punishment, Mariah stormed off through the crowd!
Backstage, the Don Callis Family were assaulting some local wrestlers. Brian Cage told Mark Davis he had to get his hands dirty, and he obliged, lending a hand in the beating!
Mark Briscoe vs. Don Callis Family’s “The Protostar” Kyle Fletcher!
Fletcher pump kicked Briscoe. Mark Briscoe flew out of the ring and wiped out Fletcher with a diving tackle. Briscoe threw a chair into the ring and set up a table on the arena floor. Briscoe dropkicked Fletcher. Briscoe went for the Cactus elbow, but Kyle caught him and countered by ramming Briscoe into the ring post! Briscoe was busted wide open!
Briscoe clobbered Fletcher with redneck Kungfu. Briscoe blasted Fletcher with an exploder suplex. Fletcher back dropped his way out of a Jay Driller. Fletcher spiked Mark with a heat seeker. Fletcher rocked Briscoe with a running knee strike, followed by a power bomb!
Mark Briscoe planted Fletcher with a fisherman’s buster. Briscoe climbed to the top, but Kyle kicked him. Briscoe tried for the cutthroat driver, but Kyle escaped and kicked Mark with a low blow as the ref had his back turned.
Fletcher walloped Briscoe with a half and half suplex. Briscoe retaliated with a froggy bow, putting Fletcher through a table! Briscoe hit another froggy bow in the ring, but Fletcher kicked out at the two-count! Fletcher picked up the pace and smashed Briscoe with a brain buster on the top turnbuckle, picking up the victory via pin fall!
“What a match! What a moment! This is just a taste of Grand Slam!” said Nigel.
Kyle: “I told you! I proved tonight that Mark Briscoe’s win over me was a fluke and in one week I do the same to Ospreay! Not only Ospreay, but I prove that the ‘Best Bout Machine’ and the ‘Aerial Assassin’ are no longer the future. The future stands in this ring and it’s the ‘Protostar’ Kyle Fletcher!”
Catch AEW DYNAMITE live on TBS and streaming on MAX next Wednesday at 8/7ct from the H-E-B Center in Austin, TX!
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And remember… We are AEW—Where The Best Wrestle!